Seeing is Believing..

and then I almost had a panic attack. NO.. I did have a panic attack..

I went on babycenter.com to look up information, research mommy details that I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE ABOUT.. like the actual birthing of a baby. I sat here at work, played the video. Didn't look too bad, it was like lady's top part of her body, she was just in pain..screaming a tad. THEN the camera goes way SOUTH. .. my heartbeat races, I'm sweating a little so I take off my sweater, I see the head of the baby, and blood stretching this woman's vulva to complete capacity..my stomach turns, and I start darting my eyes looking for a trash can.. I grab a laminated chart and start to fan myself, close my eyes and breathe deeply..until my heart races slower.. What the hell just happened? Was I that disturbed over having a baby?

Usually I'm not such a bitch over slimy, bloody, eerie things, but that got to me.

I'm totally clueless on all this stuff and it's starting to stress me out. I think this is where it's coming from. I mean you should see my dreams. Talk about weird.

Lately, I've been bugging my mom friends with all these questions. I know they are getting so tired of me asking questions that seem so, I dunoo.. dumb!? I call one up and ask about what she does with her kids while she's at work. lol So we talk about Daycare. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT DAYCARE COST?.. it's a whole brand new (LEXUS) car payment a month!!! What a rip off. So, what the hell am I gonna do?
Stay home? Yea right! Who can do that anymore? I think my hubs will have to work nights and I will work mornings.. Good-bye to seeing him anymore.. Guess that's just what having a child is about sacrificing some time together.. ? Whatever. I'm game. Fuckin bring it.

Here is the link to that video.. go see a baby born and see if you don't lose your lunch. lol Mother Giving Birth Epideral

Natural Birth

A Stork Has Landed!

Well we all know what that means now... don't we?

YES! We're having a baby! My husband and I pregnant! I know I've been absent which I sometimes do, but dealing with new fetus's in your uterus will actually deter you from alot of things. I'm happy, we're happy.. totally was an accident but good things come out those, so hey. We wanted to wait until the big 30, but 27 is close enough.

Just to update you I'm 11 weeks, so beginning of the 3rd month. I had a great 2 months, well I won't jump off the hinge and say GREAT, I had some nausea, but I didn't throw up once. Actually if it wasn't for me checking the calendar I wouldn't even of known. All I knew is I wasn't feeling like myself. I kept waking up and saying that, and I had constant butterflies. NAUSEA. Some say that's actually worse than throwing up, but after my favorite treat or two it would go away.

This baby is the first on both sides of our families, since we both are the first born grandchildren. So alot of people are excited. Husband is still in agh. He can't believe we're making humans now.. He wants to crash every hobby, fun activity, wish and want in "before the baby comes". I'm like, life isn't over when children come into your life. ...........Right? (totally 2nd guessing) I'm thinking, it's really just beginning.

I do have some fears but don't new mothers all? I wanted to wait to tell people, but 3 months is getting pretty good..if something bad happens then I've rather loved a new baby that's gone then to have never loved a new baby at all... lol (thanks William)

It's a new wondrous experience becoming a new Mommy. I sure don't know what in the hell is next, nor what the hell I'm doing but I'll surly take it. I'm due January 1st, 2010.