tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post1489042097352953669..comments2023-04-28T04:53:36.872-05:00Comments on She Bloggs.: Totally NOT a Good LookSheBloggshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05996715234987001702noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-69961938677297187372009-02-11T16:30:00.000-06:002009-02-11T16:30:00.000-06:00Oh man the story of my life! It seem everyone near...Oh man the story of my life! It seem everyone near & dear to my heart is in an abusive relationship! <BR/><BR/>I try to be there, but when it gets too crazy I distance myself for a while... I never like to say "leave him" cause they won't <BR/><BR/>I just try and remain neutral even though somtimes I want to beat his ass myself. <BR/><BR/>Hang in there doll!Bon Donhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12178535331269133985noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-40571523145390611982009-02-10T16:35:00.000-06:002009-02-10T16:35:00.000-06:00Scandy: He seems kinda killerish to me.. really. H...Scandy: He seems kinda killerish to me.. really. He's all chummy in everyones face, then when our backs are turned he's all grim talking to her.. Thanks..<BR/><BR/>Amber: I feel what your saying girl<3 I haven't been in an abusive relationship to really understand, I'm just seeing my point of view. I tried to change shoes with her in my head, I just guess anyone can be subjected to giving chance after chance when someone's whooing apology after apology. AND his words are so poetic when he wants to get her back, he knows exactly what to say.. everything a heartbroken woman wants to hear. I'm not fully going to abandon her, I just can't let her sway my emotions. We talk, like we did yesterday,... I just stopped caring.SheBloggshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05996715234987001702noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-13011078959375881942009-02-10T13:27:00.000-06:002009-02-10T13:27:00.000-06:00hmmm people dont really understand being (and stay...hmmm people dont really understand being (and staying) in a domestic abuse situation until u've either studied it or been in it. what people dont realize is that its a continuous cycle and not all the time is bad...its the good times (after he apologizes, brings her flowers, promises to never do it again, etc) that makes her stay. shes not weak minded and shes not stupid shes in a fucked up situation that she is gonna have to make a decision to get out of and stay out of. the other thing that people dont kno is that the MOST dangerous piece in these types of situations is when the woman tries to leave...thats when people started getting killed. i feel sorry for her but more importantly i feel sorry for the child thats involved...i would hate to see u totally abandon her cuz thats exactly what he wants. if he successfully isolates her from everyone its no telling if she will ever be able get out of this situation. she needs a support system and right now it sounds like ur it...def keep praying for her thoAmber-Alerthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16115871335406792697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-2014650472056040752009-02-09T14:07:00.000-06:002009-02-09T14:07:00.000-06:00This is serious. CLASSIC signs of future wife kil...This is serious. CLASSIC signs of future wife killer, no joke. I've had a friend in a similar position, and there's really not alot you can do until SHE decides to get out. I would just try to tell her that NOBODY deserves to be spoken to like that, EVER.<BR/><BR/>Good luckTuesday Taylorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07475567792744675719noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-3434493347066907002009-02-09T13:36:00.000-06:002009-02-09T13:36:00.000-06:00Island: I see what you mean, I didn't want to turn...Island: I see what you mean, I didn't want to turn my back, but it is true it's what he wants, cause he pushed everyone else away.<BR/>I hope can will leave his crazy ass... at least for her daughter.<BR/><BR/>She's Gotta: So you know how this is? Ur ears gettin tired too! I won't leave her, I'll always be near, esp if she's in serious danger, I just told her that I can't be the go too person for aruments and what not when you have no intent to leave.. Thanks for the wishes!<BR/><BR/>Ms. Mary: I fee ya there too.. it's real exhausting. No reason why I should be awake up at night worrying about her if she don't even care about herself.. It's like this shit isn't funny, do you know how stupid you are? Forget the fragility of it.. it's nonsense after awhile.<BR/><BR/>Patti: Nooo, you never told me that story! Thats craziness! So u see what I'm going through!? I gave my firend shelters too, but that was too graveling I guess..And that's messed up for her getting mad at you for telling her like it was..you are right about the tough love.. I told her this weekend from great advice from you all and she said she understood. Plus my husband was getting angry cause you know guys want to fixx things, and he didn't understand me being there for her so much when she didn't want to help herself. He thought her craziness was comming off on me..<BR/><BR/>Mary: Hello there!<BR/>Yea some people do want that in thier life.. and by me listening to it all the time is just having someone there to go through it with you, which normally thats what friends are for, but over and over with no sane outcome makes no sense to me? I'm still there, but everytime she talk about this man she's gonna have to make a solution.. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for all your comments. I can't talk to my husband about it and this was very helpful for me.. I didn't say I wrote a blog about it but I spoke to some "friends" who gave me some good suggestions. Thank you!!SheBloggshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05996715234987001702noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-68129051555382979042009-02-07T09:01:00.000-06:002009-02-07T09:01:00.000-06:00I've done this and back. Some people have all sort...I've done this and back. Some people have all sorts of complicated cravings for the negativity in life and they will let you talk them and walk them and then they will go back for more abuse. You somehow wind up the bad(cough-TRUTHFUL) friend.<BR/>I've done this, but I get to the point where I am done, and done is done. <BR/>You cannot lift most people like this up, but they can drag you down. ~MaryAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-87810177277789659922009-02-06T15:48:00.000-06:002009-02-06T15:48:00.000-06:00I might have told you this.. if so.. sorry. But I...I might have told you this.. if so.. sorry. But I used to work with a woman (she recently quit YAY) Who has 3 boys with an abusive live in boyfriend. She used to complain all the time about him beating on her. I gave her so much info on abused women shelters.. etc.. she refused to go get help. So, one day she was telling me about another beating that happened the previous night (boys watched it) I held up my hand and said STOP I am tired of hearing this, you wont get help, you won't get your boys help, they WILL continue this cycle. SO you can talk to me about ANYTHING els... I am not going to listen to this because you refuse to get help. It took her about 3 years to acknowledge my presense again, when she did she announced ... that's right.. that they were engaged. She was surprised I wasn't THRILLED for her. I don't know if they got married or not. I feel badly for the children these boys will have. <BR/><BR/><BR/>My advice, it that you tell her the same. "I love you, I care about you, but I won't listen to your tales of terror anymore." Tough love sucks.. but what else can you do?<BR/><BR/>Good Luck girlAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14869448149679702821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-23597104061091086442009-02-06T14:17:00.000-06:002009-02-06T14:17:00.000-06:00"How long do you stay & lend that ear?&qu..."How long do you stay & lend that ear?"<BR/>Speaking from a very similar experience, I can't stay around too long to lend an ear if the person on the other end is not willing to use common sense and leave a harmful situation.<BR/><BR/>Women do whatever they want to do rather than what's healthy for them in situations like that. I hope she finds peace before it's too late because he obviously needs help.Mrs. Mary Mackhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13984732196235027023noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-26036765406206891322009-02-06T14:13:00.000-06:002009-02-06T14:13:00.000-06:00It's like you've taken a page from my life! I'm go...It's like you've taken a page from my life! I'm going through the same situation with a girlfriend of mine, and I, too, became so fed up to the point that I wanted to cut her off because no matter how much I offered advice and suggestions, girlfriend stayed with him (married, had a child, moved across the country). <BR/><BR/>It seems like you're only wasting your breath and time, but don't totally abandon her. She's weak-minded and like the other commenter said, her man WANTS you and others to leave her alone so that you don't influence her in any way. Even if you don't remain close, check in on her from time to time. I wonder every day if this guy is going to kill this girl, because it's very possible. He's already put his hands on her and was arrested by police. She's still with him, though. He's on meds for his bipolar disorder and she's on meds for depression. It's a sad situation. <BR/><BR/>Don't disappear on her because then she'll feel totally hopeless and submit to him even more.Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08024064849557919508noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-837126054570632651.post-1896069053696462522009-02-06T13:53:00.000-06:002009-02-06T13:53:00.000-06:00The whole situation sounds absolutely horrible, an...The whole situation sounds absolutely horrible, and a tough one to be caught in the middle of as a friend. I think that the worst thing you could do is turn your back on her. That's exactly what he wants. He wants her to be isolated because it is easier to abuse someone who thinks that they have noone. Stick with her, and just continue being supportive, and one day she will have enough of this creep.<BR/><BR/>Wishing you the best!Smart Black Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15397749792739026913noreply@blogger.com